About Me

Do you like sex and food? Have you ever found yourself in a compromising situation and thought "Hey, what the hell?' and just gone with it?" If you answered yes to either of these question then we can probably be friends.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Chat Roulette is a Dirty Dirty Game

I've seen more penises than a porn star at a gang bang audition. 

chatroulette.com is INSANE. Its all foreign guys jerking it. All the do is sit their with their dicks out and touch themselves and ask to see tits. 

I tried to engage a guy in conversation. He had a small dong, so I figured he wouldn't be too....errr...cocky (aheheheh) and might actually be able to talk about something other than tits and ass. 

ME:  Hey. 
HIM:  Sup Skanks.
Me:  (looking around). Its just me here, sorry. 
HIM:  wat no frends?
ME:  No. No friends. Sorry. 
HIM:  You looken to get lucky 2nite?
ME:  Define lucky.
HIM:  u stupid or sumthing
ME: Or something. 
HIM:  show me ur tits
ME:  Hi, nice to meet you too. 
HIM:  wats ur name? sumthing sexy like krystal or xxxena?
ME:  Xxxena?
HIM:  like da singer, u no. dirty. 
ME:  No. You're thinking of Xtina. Christina Aguilera. 
HIM:  u hot like her
ME:  ...This is a cam site. Can you not see me?
HIM:  no i see u is dat ur frend?

Ok, at this point, I become greatly alarmed because I think two things could be happening. One, there is a scary ghost girl behind me or two, I have someone been tricked into talking to someone that actually has someone outside of my apartment and they were going to kill me Funny Games style. 

I skipped to the next person. 

THIS time I got two guys at once. Both of them had their dicks out. "Can we see your tits?"

Uh...how about you just look at each other, 'cause the whole two dicks in one screen seems pretty gay to me. 

I skipped through the next few guys.  A couple of them were wearing masks, a couple of them had the cam pointed at their crotches...and then a few of them had strap-ons on...so that was kinda weird for me. 

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